The question that has plagued all newlyweds from the first day they got married and for apparently the next three years after the wedding. G and I got married about three years ago and this question still seems like an appropriate question to ask. It’s usually asked by those people that have lost touch with you over the years and have no idea what to say since they don’t know what’s going on in your life anymore. My problem with this question is that it really has no answer.
The question can not be answered with a simple, “good,” “bad,” “I hate it,” “It’s the best fucking thing in the world” because the answer to this question depends on what happened that day, what happened that hour, or what happened five minutes ago. It depends on what has happened between you and your married person on every single moment of your married life.
If you had asked me how married life was two weeks ago when he made me dinner and washed the dishes, I would have said something along the lines of “married life is amazing!” If you had asked me this morning when I went to use the bathroom and was greeted by what can only be described as the Mount Olympus of shits, I would have said something like, “it is disgusting and so hard!”
I’m sure that if you asked G what married life was like the day I ripped his favorite underwear in half because I was able to see his balls while he was wearing it, I’m sure he would have told you to stay single if you want to keep your clothes in one piece. However, he would have told you that married life is the perfect partnership this last week when I made him breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the whole week while he was coaching the All-Star football game and packed it for him every single day so he wouldn’t be hungry.
So to answer this question for all those people asking, “Married life is how you take every single moment of every single day… so stop asking!”
To married people who ask this question of other married people: You know very well what marriage is like, asshole.